PMG WE PLAY MINI GAMES!!!!!!!!
Excuse me.
Firstly, read up on the new Pest Control game if you haven't already.
RS Newspost announcing Pest Control
RS Knowledge Base article about Pest Control
Now, the nitty gritty!
Requirements: None really, though it's members-only. :-\
Where: Rusty Anchor Inn, Port Sarim, World 27
When: Sunday, April 30, 2006, 1:00 PM PDT (Pacific Daylight Time, which is also "User's Local Time" in my profile)
OK, well, I haven't actually played the mini-game myself yet. But it looks like a fun little thing. And I haven't hosted an event in forever, and we haven't had many RS events recently. (No offense to anyone who did host an RS event recently -- I'm ignorant ;-p)
So!
1 -- Plan to show up by 1:00 PM. We'll be meeting at the Rusty Anchor Inn, mainly because it's a bar. I should be there already, with cocktails in hand. If I'm not there, no cocktails, but they should at least have beer. And maybe other stuff. I dunno.
2 -- We will leave the Inn at 1:15 PM sharp-ish. Stragglers, take note. (This doesn't mean you can't join the fun if you're late; it just means you won't get free cocktails.)
3 -- Once at the Void Knights' Outpost, we will meet up again before boarding the lander. Obviously we'll have to wait until the lander has room on it -- if we try to board when it's nearing capacity, it'll fill up, depart, and leave some of us behind, which would be silly

4 -- Fightin' 'round the world! The lander will arrive at the island... we'll kill things, destroy the portals, and let the Void Knight not die... we'll get money and some (easy?) combat experience... and repeat the process over and over again until we feel like not repeating said process anymore.
If you can, give the mini-game a try before the event rolls around; maybe we can come up with strategies or... something.
Frequently Asked Questions! (Well, not really, as nobody's asked any yet.)
You said you'll provide free cocktails "if" you show up and, otherwise, we'll have to settle for the beer. Why oh why are the free cocktails only a possibility?
Simple, really. My schedule is freakin' random. (This is why I haven't hosted anything since the Mystery Event -- which, if you don't remember, took place on RuneScape Classic when RuneScape Classic was still "RuneScape" and RuneScape as we now know it was still the unreleased "RuneScape 2.") Still, besides the prospect of free cocktails for you people, there's nothing in this event that really requires me to be there. That way, even if I can't make it, you guys can still have fun killing stuff, even if you're not quite as drunk whilst doing so.
Why oh why are you excluding free players?
Because I'm taking advantage of a new minigame, and Jagex made it members-only. And because most clan events are on free servers anyway. And because cocktails are members-only as well.
But you're Captain Jack Sparrow! You're that 'but why is the rum gone?" guy! Why oh why are you serving Gnomish cocktails when none of them contain rum?
Because the only rum that can be found in RuneScape is from Karamja, and you can't drink it. (Actually, I'd assume the "Rum Deal" quest deals with drinkable rum, but I'm too lazy to do it.) Besides, cocktails have some degree of... hm, shall we say, refined-society-ness to them. And stuff.
You know, this event really seems like more of an excuse for you to talk about cocktails than anything else.
Yarr, ye must be new here; welcome to SeeD
