[Dragonman]

I got these jokes off a runescape site and they are hilarious.

You know you've spent too much time on RuneScape when:
1. You consider 500k poor
2. You leave Rune armour after a kill because it's not worth the space it
takes in your pack
3. You can 3-hit ladykilljoy
4. Someone can only get your attention by calling you by your RS name
instead of your real name
5. Your dreams all revolve around RuneScape
6. You call up your friends and ask them if they want to help you kill some
people in the woods
7. You go crazy if you have to spend more than 24 hours away from the game
8. Your history essay is on the history of RuneScape
9. You go hunting with a sword instead of a rifle.
10. It doesn't matter if you have real money as long as you have money in
the game
11. You set your alarm to wake you up after 5 seconds of rest
12. You buy a computer for every room in the house so you can play RS where
ever you are

You know you been playing rs too much when:
1. When you attack an old lady, you claim that you are training.
2. When you pick up a penny, you wonder why it won't respawn
3. When you the king black dragon looks dark green too you.
4. When you pk someone, they get banned.
5. When they have to take off a digit off you combat level.
6.When ladykilljoy can't attack you cause her level is too low.

You know you're too much of a noob when:
A level 3 looks red to you

You know you play too much RuneScape when Andrew says to you go away plz dont kill me.

You know you been playing RuneScape too long when...
1. You go to work saying "buying pickaxe, 1gp yell 000"
2. You are at gunpoint and you say "go ahead, I'll only drop five bucks"
3. There's two permanent hollow spaces on your computer chair
4. Your clicking finger is the strongest muscle in your body
5. You go to school and realize that you forgot your pickaxe
6. Andrew goes crazy trying to create a monster that you can't kill
7. The servers crash when you log on

You know that you are a noob when...
1. A chicken 3-hits you.
2. An imp's level is written in red.
3. You spend your first 1k gp on goblin armour.
4. You brag that your "main" has a dragon 2-hander.
5. You report someone for maging on your goblins.
6. Your "get rich plan" is to pick bananas and sell them to Luthas.
7. Luthas files for bankruptcy

When you have been playing RuneScape for too long...
Some guy dies and you sit there and wait for his stuff to apear.

What is big, black, and scary?
Ladykillijoy wearing black armor.

What is it called when you pickpocket a zombie?
Rob Zombie

When you know you've been playing RuneScape too long...
1. You spray paint your cat red and call it an imp
2. You perk up from you sleep when your teacher mentions the coal export in the
middle east.
3. You find a penny on the ground, and stand and wait for the next re spawn.
4. You constantly hear the repeated clicking sound from leveling mining that
drives you mad.

Where did the man go for a potty break?
To the Barbarian outhouse.

Why did the noob cross the street?
Because he couldn't teleport yet.

You know you've played too much RuneScape when...1. The black dragon retreats from you.
2. You've reached 100 hitpoints.
3. Paralyze monster starts to work on human opponents in the wilderness.
4. You can mine dragon ore.
5. You start saying 'ty' to people when they give you something.
6. You buy a chocolate bar for 100gp at the convenience store.
7. You make your own RS site
8. You can mine ores even when there is no ore in the rock.
9. The store owners know you.
10. You can run in the game.
11. If someone hits a 13 on you you physically start bleeding.
12. Fish are so afraid of you that you don't need to cook them. -

This post has been edited by Dragonman565: 03 February 2003 - 11:55 AM

[CongressJon]

Hey Dragonman, I've got some more. If some are the same, well, o well. (also, I got some from a web page)

You've been playing Rs too long when....
You're at Mickey D's and you ask where the nearest burger respawn is.
You're about to be shot and say,"Go ahead and shoot me! I'll only drop $2!!!"
You see a man named Andrew and bow down to worship him.
You get a broken arm and start eating apple pie and pizza thinking you'll be healed.
You're parents call you by your rs name.
When Andrew pays you to play.
You use water blast and create a lake.
You log on and all servers crash.
You have the option "Do not let people follow you." reserved for you.
All rats and spiders within a 30-square radius die instantly when you walk past.
Oziach doesn't waste his time and just GIVES you the rune plate.
You kill a monster and it doesn't respawn.
You can't find anybody to fight in level 48 wilderness.
You smith a cadillac out of silver and steel bars.
You catch Moby Dick while fishing.

Like these?

[thebomb2]

i found those same 1ce be 4 lol i forgot wut site it was on

[thebomb2]

here are some more


You know your character is strong enough when...


Your fighting stats hit triple digits.
You log in and everyone else logs out.
You walk into the wilderness and it's deserted.
You can kill demons with a bronze sword.
You start inventing your own spells.
Other players pray to you.
Monsters never get 3 rounds to run when you attack them.
You walk up to the greater demon spawn, and the crowd parts to let you pass.
You turn on Protection from Missiles, go into the wilderness for a 2-hour killing spree, and when you return, you still have prayer points left.
You're the best in every skill on the server status.
You suffer a nasty 15 second lag and come to surrounded by rune large helms.




i can name alot more i just like to do a little at a time

[thebomb2]

here some more for

You know you're been playing RS too long when

You change your social security number to match your attack, defence, and strength skills, and it fits.
Someone cuts you off and you start shouting "SCAMMER" down the freeway.
You get a system message "You have been standing in this spot for 5 Years! Please move to another area!"
You get a system message "Welcome to your (mining, fishing, cooking, crafting) spot".
When someone doesnt seem to know you, you know they're a newbie.
Your parents call you down for dinner using your character name.
You receive junk mail addressed to your character name.
Theres a spot reserved for you in every building you go to.
You dont need the online map. For anything. Ever.
You give people directions to anywhere by number of steps.
The server takes 10 minutes loading your character.
You get robbed in real life and you look for a man named Moderator to help you out.
You wonder what your "age" is.
You brag about having played xxx ammount of hours.
Instead of saying, "Wanna take this out on the street?" you say, "Wanna take this to the wilderness?"
You ask your friend in real life does he want to go to pk in the wilderness after school.
You ask a priest in real-life if you can use the altar to recharge your prayer points.
You hear an announcement in school and you say "I just saw a system message!"




well thats all im saying for right now

[Dragonman]

Nice ones guys. I'll try to come up with ones myself every time I come on to keep you seeDs laughing.

Here are a few that aren't really good that just came off the top of my head:

You know you've been playing runescape too long when:
Andrew lets you be a memebr for free.
You give anything to someone who asks for it.
You have 100 party hats of every color and 1000 easter eggs.
Andrew lets you decide the next rare item to be dropped during the next holiday.
Noobs name a day after you.
Black dragons flee every time you are in their presence.
Your friend mother asks you over for dinner and you ask what her cooking level is.
You are the a co-owner of all the guilds.


PS:My favorite joke from hyperfried's list is the option for not letting people follow you, and my favorite joke from thebomb2's list the one about asking your friend if he wants to go pking after school and asking a priest if you can recharge your prayer points.

This post has been edited by Dragonman565: 04 February 2003 - 01:36 AM

[CongressJon]

Hey guys! I've got a good idea! We can ask Cspace if either:

1. We could make a forum for jokes.
or
2.We could make this another marquee competition

Just an idea, but anyways, here's some more-

You know you;ve been playing rs too long when.....

You try cooking pizza and it says "Do you want to make this a dinner for 4?"
You fall asleep with paralyze monster on at 9, and at 7am, you still have prayer points left.
You try to deposit 2 apple pies in your bank account, and wonder why it doesn't work.
You keep bumping into ppl thinking you can pass right through them
All monsters names appear as "Infernal Creature" on your screen
You don't have the option to smith bronze anymore
When you put on anything worse than black it says, "You attempt to put on the (bronze, iron, or steel) armor. You throw it off in disgust.

[Dragonman]

Here's a few more I made up:

You know that you've been playing runescape too long when:
You try to deposit a sword at the bank
While fishing, you ask your buds how much more exp they need to raise another fishing level.
Black dragon's levels are in light green.
You have 5 level 100 chars.

[whitefire909]

heres some every one can relate to once in there life....

you know ur a noob when:
u trade lvl 30's even when u have nothing
u try to wild a bronze long and it says u need 10 more lvls
it takes you 40 hits to kill a rat(lvl 3)
u hit -'s
u dont have anuff gp to buy a pot
u try to sell bones
u spend most of ur time in lummie cuse u keep dieing
u mine 1 tin ore and u need sleep
it takes u 60 clicks to get 1 tin ore
u brun all ur meat
u kill a rat(3) and u gain 5 lvls

u kno ur to good when:
u can mine 2000 rune ore with out sleep
ur gp takes up 5 spots in ur bank
andrew bans u for pking him in the wild
every player in rs has u on there freinds list
u have ur own armour type
u test new skills for andrew...
u hit in the 100's
if ur freind asks if he can barrow a cuple thousand, u give him 5000k
u need to buy a new mouse every mounth
u join a clan and there is 3 members, next day there 4003
u have a sever named after u
u go to drop partys with r2hs
u have ur own fan club
u never log out
u have a on ur computer chair
the world 1 rune fest follows u
they change the name of rs to ur user name

[CongressJon]

You know you've been playing too long when....

Every shop offers a buy one get one free sale

You see a man in the dead forest behind your house and try to assault him. He asks why and you say, "Duh. You can attack people in the wilderness. Every idiot knows that."

You can 1-hit ANYTHING

You start using abbriviations like ty with your friends.

Also, what site are your jokes from?

[Dragonman]

My first ones came from www.runescapecentral.com.
The other ones I made up.

[CongressJon]

You've been playing too long when...

You start selling r2h's on ebay.
You identify all short people as dwarves.
You go to the GAP and ask if they have any rune skirts in stock.
You get one of those dinky "Burger King Crowns" and try to sell it for $1,000,000
You end up in heaven and wonder why you're not in Lumbridge.
You try to make quick cash by selling various kinds of seafood.
You find a diamond and try to put it in your dad'd hip-hop medallion.
Hans commits suicide when you come near him.
It takes you xx years to gain one level.
You start smithing clusters of 1k from gold bars.
You put a gold bar in a furnace, and it comes out a a chandelier.
You wake up and wonder where the log-in screen is.

[CongressJon]

You know you are a noob when a chicken kills you.

You know you're a noob when you can't find enough bones for the imp catcher quest

You know you've played too much RuneScape when...

You sleep standing up
You steal your grand-fathers axe, colour it red and sell it for 200,000 'gp'
You don't snore, you just say 'zzzzzz'
Your 10 second sleeps completely refresh you
You get tired when fishing (despite the fact that you usually never catch anything!)
You use slang like 'lol' when someone makes a funny joke
You go around randomly killing guards at the Parliament Buildings and when you're caught, you say 'don't you know you level faster on these guys?!'
Stealing gets boring
You don't understand why there is no axe shop in town
You're not afraid of scorpions
You've looked on every world map but you just can't find Varrock!
You steal peoples walking sticks because you hate telegrabbers
The only quest you can find is 'Doing The Chores' and the reward is only 10 bucks
You don't understand why nobody has any armour or weapons in your home
you only wear one pair of clothes
You cut down every tree in sight trying to get to level 99 woodcutting and you wonder when they will reappear
Every week you go get a makeover and pay 2000 gold
You think it's odd that you have knees
Chicken tastes bad to you
You broke a 'fastest shark eating' record
You don't understand why people are giving you funny looks when you don't bend your knees when walking
Every one you know plays runescape
You only go to a dance, funeral, party, wedding etc. if they drop things at the end of it
You can't understand why martinis cost 20+ dollars when you could make one for free

You know you played Runescape to long when...
The shop keepers give you all their stuff because they think your gonna beat them up

You know you’ve been playing runescape to long when your children are digital.

You know you have been playing RuneScape too long when...

You forget to eat
You haven't changed your clothes in weeks
You haven't seen daylight for a while
You don't have time to blink
You forget your real name
You're playing different characters on different computers
You picture the game from the character's view not the one on the screen
Your friend bugs you so when he comes over you kill him

If God made noobs then Lumbridge is holy land!

You know you've played too much RuneScape when:

You read the Harry Potter books and wonder why they can do magic without runes
After you've eaten a chicken leg, you bury the bones in the ground to gain prayer.
You know you've been playing RuneScape too long when...

You can say an entire sentence in nothing but abbreviations
You try to eat food to stop yourself from bleeding
You go to the ocean and try to fish for sharks
You go to a jewelry store and try to steal gems
You get angry because you failed to carry 30 logs in your backpack
You give your local town banker a fish and tell him I'll be back next week for it
You are late to school and you try to explain to your teacher that you kept failing your teleport spell
You sell your cat so you can get 1 more month as a RuneScape member
You get criticized by your gym teacher that you are too scrawny and you tell him your main character is much stronger

[CongressJon]

Also, my head is rolling on the floor

[Mrb1]

you know you've been playing runsscape too long...

when you start selling r2h's for 1k.
when you one hit black dragons.
when you start giving money away
when you creste a new charachter they don't make you take the tutorial.
when you think rune sucks